Banana Cookie
by Rainless Thunder
Summary: A banana and a cookie, what more can you ask for?


Disclaimer: Wait, who said I did? That liar.

Enjoy!

Banana Cookie

"Will you please stop Hikaru?" Haruhi said irately, slapping his hand away from the black dress, she was forced to wear. If she was going to wear it, then no one had better mess with her. It was all Kyoya's fault for mentioning to Tamaki that men in the Victorian Era were very gracious to women, and managed to be dapper at the exact same time.

That was all Kyoya was required to say to convince Tamaki completely that—

"This is the stupidest idea Tamaki has come up with yet." Haruhi said scratching her neck. While the twins bustled around her, tying up the myriad of ribbons that hung from her dress. The corset, oh the corset, the piece of clothing the twins managed to conjure out of nowhere. The corset that now, Kaoru was gingerly tightening from behind her.

"Don't worry Haruhi." Kaoru said nonchalantly from behind her. "This shouldn't hurt because—"

"It's not squeezing anything." The twins chorused.

"You guys think you're funny." Haruhi gasped. "Tamaki's a dead man." Haruhi said with an expression worthy of Kyoya Ootori himself.

"Ooo, the boss is gonna get it." Kaoru whispered to his brother who sat at Haruhi's feet, lacing up her boots.

"I know, the boss is a dead man, but at least the last thing he'll see is Haruhi in this adorable outfit." Hikaru murmured back, over Haruhi's shoulder as he stood up.

"Ya' know, guys, I can hear you." Haruhi replied icily as she attempted to walk towards the door of the prep room that lead to the outside room where the Host Club took place. Her hand grabbed a nearby chair and she plopped herself down breathing heavily.

"Kaoru, I think this thing is a bit too tight." She breathed.

"That, Haruhi, means it's working correctly." Hikaru replied, walking up to her and grabbing her hand. "I'll help you." Hikaru smirked at his brother who smirked back, their little exchange going unseen by Haruhi who had both arms around her waist as she exhaled and inhaled slowly.

"So, you guys, where are we going today?" she hated to ask the question but curiosity got the better of her. _Just in the club room today, Haruhi._ She hoped.

"In the field outback." Kaoru answered casually.

"Where's the field outback?" Haruhi questioned, eyebrows furrowed.

"Don't you know where were talking about, Haruhi?"

"I do?"

"Let's go!" the twins said impatiently, heaving her up, their arms around her waist, and whisking her through the doorway.

"…And ladies may the everlasting rainfall of my love pour down upon you and…"

"Drench you." The twins said abruptly, their arms wrapped tightly around Haruhi. "Are we late boss?" the twins tipped their heads inward, both their foreheads up-close to Haruhi, who was swooning, but not in a good way. To the clients, this looked like the ultimate passion, the girls fainting and squealing. Tamaki on the other hand, looked scandalized.

"Haruhi! Come to Daddy." He grabbed her limp hand. "What's wrong with Haruhi, you ungrateful children?" he questioned the twins, who shrugged.

"It looks like the corset the twins have adorned her with may have had the opposite effect…, or rather, Haruhi's lost consciousness." Kyoya explained bluntly. He didn't mean to have deadpanned it so honestly, but there was no other way to get it to click into Tamaki's thick head.

"You twins!" he shouted at them "Take Haruhi and loosen up that monstrosity you call a corset." Tamaki then proceeded to mumble audibly about the twins and hurting his "daughter".

"Tamaki, your clients." Kyoya said indifferently, his eyes scanning a black notebook that lay in his hands.

Tamaki immediately whipped around, hands clasped, and his violet eyes sparkling.

'Ladies, don't think I forgot about you." He whispered to a swooning girl, her chin tipped upward by Tamaki's hand, his violet eyes piercing her every being.

"Where's Haruhi going?" one girl asked from behind Tamaki.

"I needed to ask him a question."

"The dress he wore was soooooo cute; I wanted to ask him where he got it from."

"The twins?"

"Don't worry Ladies in due time." Tamaki said soothingly.

The supple scent of a ripe fruit, it is a….what was its name again. The faint smell of the unknown fruit brought Haruhi to consciousness. Her wide eyes opened to the sight of a big yellow banana that was almost practically smothering her.

"A banana, you guys, really?" she said slapping it away. "You guys are using a _banana_ to bring me back to consciousness?" Haruhi said incredulously. This had to be an all time low for them.

"Haruhi!" a chorus said happily.

"Haruhi!" a tone of utmost surprise.

"Haru-chan!" a voice chirped.

"Haruhi." a deep voice spoke contentedly.

"Haruhi." the distant voice said melodiously.

"Why a bana_na!"_ her last syllable drowned by Tamaki, who merged on her when she began to sit up.

"Haruhi, you mustn't bare your maidenly form to these uncouth men!" he whispered urgently into Haruhi's ear. Earning himself looks from the other members of the Host Club.

"All of us are just as pure as you are, Boss." Hikaru raised an eyebrow.

"Maybe even maybe purer." Kaoru added suspiciously, "Pervert." They both whispered audibly behind their hands.

"Hey! I'm protecting the purity of my one and only daughter from the real devils…" Tamaki continued, subconsciously his hand had begun to tighten around Haruhi's bare shoulder. The more passionate he spoke, the tighter his hold became.

Haruhi tensed. "Tamaki." She said finally. "Let go." She glared at him.

Tamaki's hold instantly loosened. "My Daughter, I have harmed you, my darling, as I hold you, believe me," Tamaki took her into his arms. "I apologize for my ravage to your delicate skin—"

"_I_ believe Tamaki that Haruhi should be heading towards the prep room now for her clothes, before she really is sexually harassed." Kyoya pointed out, pushing up his glasses, the twins snickering from Kyoya's right at Tamaki's shocked look. "Kindly step away from Haruhi, Tamaki." Kyoya said closing his notebook with a sharp snap. "You've frightened her quite enough."

Tamaki looked down at Haruhi, who took her queue from Kyoya's words, and stared up at him with innocent eyes.

"Let's go Haruhi, time to get you dressed." The twins chorused, grabbing Haruhi's arms and snatching her out of Tamaki's dumbfounded grip, at the same time maintaining their grip on the blanket that covered her top half, but fluttered at her knees that lay constricted by the bottom half of the dress.

"So, Haruhi, do you feel better?" Kaoru murmured from behind her as his limber fingers did quick work of the corset ribbons.

"Thanks Kaoru." Haruhi smiled.

"So, Haruhi, you should thank Kyoya Senpai for bailing you out."

"I should," Haruhi bit her lip. "But, Senpai isn't exactly the type to except petty apologies."

"Now, when did I say that?" Kyoya said from the doorway to the prep room. Haruhi's head whipped in his direction.

"I didn't mean it like that Senpai, honest." Haruhi said nervously, hands up in an innocent manner.

"Then what did you mean?" Kyoya said coming closer to her.

"I—" Haruhi looked up at Kyoya who had taken her chin within his fingers and tilted her head upwards in a Tamaki like manner.

"Maybe next time, you'll think up a better excuse."

Haruhi was transfixed, a blush appearing on her cheeks. "Senp—"

"Hey! You twins, kindly direct me to the location of my cookie, I won this bet." Kyoya suddenly let go of Haruhi and pointed towards the twins. Who in turn, were clapping in utter disbelief.

"Wow, your almost as good as Boss, Senpai…" Kaoru said

"Maybe even better…" Hikaru added

"Haruhi didn't even think about rejecting you." They chorused. "Tono!" they called, "You lost the bet also."

"When did this become a three way bet?" Kyoya raised an eyebrow.

"Since Milord overheard us talking about it." Hikaru answered.

"Wait, Wait, Wait, you guys bet on whether Kyoya Senpai could make me blush or not?" Haruhi asked uncertain.

"Swoon." Hikaru said

"But a blush was acceptable." Kaoru added.

"And not reject him," Tamaki said sadly as he entered the prep room. "Why Haruhi, you reject Daddy, but why not Mommy!"

"Calm down Tamaki, now where's my cookie?"

**Anyway that was kinda plotless, but cute wasn't it 0_0 Still don't think Kyoya is the type to act that way but oh well… Oh and the field the Host Club took place in was the field where Honey battles Yasuchika in the manga. Sorry, that question wasn't answered in the story. **

**The part about the banana, that was just random on my part. Thanks for reading. Read and Review please and thankyou.**


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